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Tips for Managing High-Conflict Child Custody Situations

by | Sep 30, 2024 | Child custody and child support

When your children are involved, the matter is of primary importance, and emotions – for good reasons – tend to run high. If you’re facing a high-conflict child custody case, there are several important tips that can help see you through with your parental rights intact. One of the most important things is having the professional legal representation of an experienced Orange County child custody attorney in your corner from the start. If results matter, then it matters who you retain to represent you.

Factors that Tend to Make Child Custody Cases More Hotly Contested

The kinds of factors that tend to amplify the intensity of child custody cases and that often make them more difficult to manage include things like the following:

  • Emotional Intensity – The more emotionally charged your breakup was with your ex, the more strained your ability to communicate is likely to be, which can directly affect your ability to negotiate fair child custody terms.
  • Chronic Litigation – Nothing says conflict like litigation, and if your ex seems more interested in taking you to court than in resolving your child custody concerns, it spells trouble.
  • Refusal to Compromise – Effective co-parenting is a balancing act, and if your children’s other parent is only interested in doing things their way, it’s likely to turn up the heat in your case.
  • An All or Nothing Approach – If your ex is focused on cutting you out of your children’s lives or seriously limiting the amount of time you’re able to spend with them, it makes the matter that much more dire and should not be ignored.

No two Orange County child custody cases are alike, but qualities like those listed above tend to make them more contentious.

Child Custody in Orange County

In Orange County – as well as in every other jurisdiction – child custody terms are based on the best interests of the children. And as long as there is no significant reason for the court ruling otherwise, both parents can expect to receive generous parenting time schedules. Orange County judicial officers generally attempt to fashion equal time-sharing child custody orders if this can be done consistently with a child’s best interests. It is well established that children are better off when they have both parents in their lives, and this will be reflected in your child custody orders.

Proceed with Caution

As you head into your high-conflict child custody case, it’s important to do so with intention and care.

You Need Trusted Legal Counsel

Work with a skilled Orange County child custody attorney from the start. Doing so can directly impact the outcome of your case and also help ensure that your rights are protected throughout. When the stakes are high, such as when your children are involved, the matter is too important to simply retain a child custody lawyer as a result of a casual referral from a friend. Do your due diligence before you make the decision.

Open Communication Is Key

Keep the lines of communication open between you and your children’s other parent. Even if you aren’t currently in a place where you can communicate with them effectively in person or on the phone, you should establish a means of communicating electronically, such as through texts, emails, or the directing messaging function in a parenting app. A big part of parenting is coordinating schedules, and you need a way to remain in contact regarding your children.

Documentation Is an Important Tool

In child custody cases, matters can boil down to a “he said, she said” situation – if you don’t have documentation backing you up. Communicating with your children’s other parent electronically can lead to highly effective documentation, and other important tools include:

  • Keeping a calendar specifically for the purpose of jotting down relevant information, including when your kids are with you and when they’re with your ex and information about your interactions with your ex
  • Compiling receipts that pertain to your case, such as those related to your children’s counseling sessions or your own parenting classes – as applicable
  • Noting your efforts to be an effective co-parent, including your commitment to supporting your children’s relationship with their other parent

Follow All Court Orders

In a high-conflict Orange County child custody case, you’ve no doubt been to court a time or two, and carefully following the orders handed down by the court is critical. This is your opportunity to demonstrate your commitment to doing what’s right by your children, which can go a long way toward bolstering your position moving forward. Even if your ex thwarts your efforts to stick to the court orders that are already in place – such as in terms of visitation – your attempts at doing so show your children that you’re there for them and can work in your favor in court.

Focus on Your Children’s Best Interests

The reason child custody cases tend to become so heated has to do with the powerful bond between parents and children. You and your ex both ultimately want what’s best for your children, but you may be having trouble recognizing this in the midst of your case. As you forge a better path forward, let all the following guide you:

  • Don’t use your children as go-betweens. They shouldn’t have to do your communicating for you.
  • Pay attention to your children’s overall well-being, and if you see them struggling, get them the help they need.
  • Don’t argue with your ex in front of your children, and if your ex can’t stop themself, don’t engage.
  • Don’t badmouth your ex in front of your children.

The best policy when it comes to a high-conflict child custody case is staying as calm as you can, treating your ex with as much respect as possible, being patient with the process, and working closely with your Orange County child custody attorney.

Turn to an Experienced Orange County Child Custody Attorney for the Help You Need Today

Child custody cases are never easy, and if yours is in high-conflict territory, you’re facing a serious challenge. The compassionate child custody attorneys at Minyard Morris in Orange County, California, have the experience, passion, and legal insight to help you successfully navigate the difficult path forward with your parental rights protected. Your case is important to you and your children, so take the time to compare Minyard Morris with other options. Call us at 949-724-1111 for more information about how we can help you today.